Sloppy Seconds: The Tucker Max Leftovers
by Tucker Max
published by Blue Heeler Books
released on February 5, 2012
Recently humor author Tucker Max made some big announcements, that he was releasing two new books on the same day and that afterward he would no longer be writing funny, frat style books. It wasn’t until the release day of his new books, Hilarity Ensues and Sloppy Seconds: The Tucker Max Leftovers, that he made another announcement, the latter book is free.
That’s right, the e-book version of Max’s last book of debauched stories is free…forever. He put it out for free as a gift to his fans. He could have easily sold it for a discounted price and still made a ton of money so this is pretty great of him. Sloppy Seconds consists of stories that didn’t make it into his other books plus a few stories from those books. So checking it out is a great way to find out if you dig Max’s voice and want to plunk down the dough for the other books as well.
I’m a fan of Tucker’s work but he’s definitely not for everyone. If you’ve also had those, “oh my god, I was so trashed, what did I do last night?” mornings then you’ll probably relate a bit. Max is a self described asshole who doesn’t shy away from insulting anyone.
Types of people in this book who he makes fun of include but aren’t limited to the following:
overweight women (a lot, so yeah, be prepared)
people who sext
Overall I really enjoyed the book. It cracked me up consistently. Now I’ll share some of my favorite parts so you can get a feel for it.
Tucker mistakes a man for a woman and exclaims over his hotness.
“I will not apologize for being awesome.”
When a girl won’t tell him what her shirt means he decides to fuck her and then steal the shirt. He does so and then another woman calls him on wearing a tiny shirt.
“Because I have a bullhorn and you do not! Your fancy book learnin’ should’ve taught you that the strong do what they want, and the weak endure what they must. Now bring me your finest meats and cheeses, and be quick about it!”
The bull horn story really kills me for some reason. It’s just about Tucker buying a super loud bull horn and insulting people during an overnight line to buy tickets to a sporting event in college.
“Sexting is fucking stupid: it’s only appropriate for repressed teenagers or attention-starved cockteases, not for grown adults who have actual sex with other adults.” (my thoughts exactly)
When Max’s book I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell was made into a movie he put his actual number in the movie. Then a ton of girls tried to sext with him. So he would reply to their dirty texts with ridiculous, gross messages. He also sends someone a picture of Levar Burton instead of himself. When she complains that it isn’t him since he isn’t black he calls her a racist. He sends all sorts of other messages as well including calling chicks on their shitty grammar and telling them his penis is small.
He gets into a fight at a nighttime Harry Potter release.
He refers to an “All You Can Drink” night at a bar as “both A Reason To Live and A Potential Way To Die”, so true.
He talks about how pompous and jerky that doctors can be.
He live tweets a blowjob.