Movie Review: Demolition Man

Feb
2016
03

posted by on Movie Reviews, Movies/TV

1 comment

This review was edited by yours truly, but written by Robert Sunshine.~missemmamm

4.5 out of 5

demolition man poster

Hello, beloved viewers, and welcome to another article from the least famous man you have ever met. Giving you my opinion about things you don’t care about, whether you like it or not. Today we are talking about the beautiful world of “Demolition Man”, played by that one actor, Sylvester Stallone. He’s a man who can scream throughout most of his acting career, and become one of the most well renown actors.

I can't believe that I've never seen, let alone, played this.-missemmamm

I can’t believe that I’ve never seen, let alone, played this.-missemmamm

The movie starts out at the end of an unassumingly endless confrontation between the Demolition Man and Simon Phoenix (Wesley Snipes). This results in the deaths of several innocent lives. By the way, if your nickname is the Demolition Man you need to assume at least two things: 1. if you are in the police force and your constant actions give you that nickname….maybe you should be at a desk filing paperwork so you don’t cause the death of anybody, 2. the most obvious reason, YOU SHOULD NOT BE IN THE FIELD DUE TO YOUR CONSTANT RECKLESSNESS.

Having said that, do not get me wrong. I understand the pull to the audience. It was during a time when explosions and rippling muscles were what made classic cinematic masterpieces. Even today, it still does make for some potential classics, but I digress.

demolition man virtual sex

Due to the said death of several innocents, John Spartan receives a frozen sentence of many years. Though, he does end up getting his sentence cut short. This happens, when Phoenix blows up everything and kills everyone. Blows up and kills everyone…or like maybe, three people. This is a peaceful future where the biggest string of crime is graffiti.

90s taco bell logo

Anyway, stuff happens where they show weird future stuff, like the three shells and Taco Bell being the only fast food chain left, resulting in it becoming high class cuisine. After conflicts and a scene of sex but, no sex, Spartan freezes and crushes Phoenix (aka Mr Murder Death Kill). This shows off to the other cops what he can do and he also exchanges bodily fluids with the token female cop. Shows the cops what to do and exchanges bodily fluids with token female cop (Sandra Bullock as Lenina Huxley).

There are some interesting things that I noticed, which they never really touched upon. For instance, is wife and his daughter, or rather just his daughter. You see, they do mention that his wife was killed or murdered or just in general, is not around anymore. But, they hardly touch upon his daughter or even let him know that she is alive. Maybe there is something that I missed, but I don’t know. I’ve only watched the movie once, and so maybe I’m going to catch something next time that I didn’t during my initial viewing, but, until then, I’m only going to assume that them not mentioning what happened to his daughter is either a cop out, or just general laziness.

NOW, here is why I love this movie. I am a man. I love explosions, unnecessary murder and guns. I can’t help it. It’s in my blood. It’s what i breath. It’s how I live. Boom, Boom, pow, and all of that other junk.

This movie really was fun. I’m 23. I feel kind of embarrassed when I say that I haven’t seen this movie before. According to missemmamm, the amount of incredible movies that I’ve never seen is shocking. I promise that I will see them, one at a time. But, I do feel like it gives me a unique perspective. The perspective of someone in my generation, who hasn’t seen a movie quite like the ones from ten, twenty, or thirty years ago. So, I want to type about these little treasures from a fresher look, from a later generation.

All in all, from the ramblings of a mad, intoxicated, 23 year old, I think I am going to give this movie, a 4.5 out of 5. The only reason, being that I do not know what the three sea shells are for….but i am still not sure if that is a good or a bad thing.

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Movie Review: Total Recall
Movie Review: Hotel Transylvania 2-also by Robert Sunshine
Movie Review: Project Almanac
Movie Review: Thor The Dark World
Movie Review: Seven Psychopaths

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