Posts Tagged ‘movie review’

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This post was written by correspondent Robert Sunshine and edited by me.~missemmamm

 
Warning: Spoilers Abound (for the first film, as well)

ht2 fam

Hello, children. Today, I have a special little story for you. Recently, missemmamm, my lovely temptress, and I decided to go see a movie. What movie did we go see, you ask? Well, keep reading and I might tell you. Man, you guys can be impatient sometimes, you know?

Anyway, we went to go see Hotel Transylvania 2. It’s that movie with Adam Sandler and Andy Samberg, whose names sound extremely close to each other. The fact that they both were musical talent on SNL also seems a little more of a coincidence. But, oh well, back on to my ravings of a mad man.

The story of the first Hotel Transylvania took place in the year whatever the fuck. Dracula builds a castle for the protection of all monsters, including his newborn baby girl, to save them from the horrors of the human race. As years pass, his child wishes to leave the castle and explore the world. Fearing for her safety, Adam Draculer builds a fake city using zombies as townsfolk to scare her from leaving. It works. Yada, Yada, Yada.

Andy Sandberg shows up and is like “dude”. The daughter, having never met another man her age, falls in love instantly. Now, the reason I’m talking about the story of the first movie isn’t really to give you a lot of backstory. It’s to show that this movie is already giving a bit of a racial undertone. Dracula is afraid of Andy Johnnystein because he is a human and humans are not to be trusted. Now, we don’t really see any hints of racism show up until his daughter starts to express her feelings. Dracula says that it’s unheard of, disgusting, and fearful. In the end, they fall in love. Dracula accepts Andy into his vampire heart and accepts his daughter is going to love him, regardless of his opinion.

Now, let’s turn to the second movie. I just want to point out that I know everything in this movie was in all good fun. I’m not trying to derail you from watching this movie, because I personally loved it. The message they were getting across isn’t the blatant racism, but how they react to it. It’s how in the end, it didn’t matter the race of species. Whether monster or human, mattered, but how they were able to accept each other, rather than just tolerate them. The story of the movie itself is incredible. The general racism in the movie is only there to show that in the end, none of it mattered. Then again, as I said, earlier, these are probably just the ramblings of a mad man who pays too much attention to these movies. Okay, now that that’s out of the way…

hotel transylvania 2 wedding

hotel transylvania 2 son

Now, fast forward a few years. The young couple are married. They have a half-breed baby, half vampire and half human. Now, I wont go into too much detail about this movie, except for a couple key parts. Mavis wants to move to Andy’s hometown. Dracula wants them to stay for two reasons: he wants to protect the baby from the outside world and he wants to try to get the child’s baby fangs to grow. Everyone believes the boy is human, but Dracula is determined to prove otherwise.

Nick Offerman and Megan Mullally in Hotel Transylvania 2

Okay, so there’s the general plot. Now, Andy’s parents are your typical suburban couple, who are now in the movie series to show their tolerance of monsters. Thinking they are abnormal and that their grandson shouldn’t be in that kind of environment, because they think that he is a human as well. Now to try to convince them to stay, they brought two “mixed couples” to show how “progressive there community is”. One of the couples was supposed to be a werewolf and a woman. The man who they thought was a werewolf just had a big beard. So, it was generally just typical monster profiling. There’s another scene, in which Dracula’s father made it very clear how disgusting he thought it was that humans and monsters were mingling together. There is actually a straight shot of his face saying that it’s wrong. That’s when it went from subtle to in your face.

ht2 granddad

Finally, at the end of the movie, the grandfather’s henchman, realizing that the baby was a half-breed, screamed his own personal disgust. After threatening his friend, the boys vampire blood awoke to kick some serious racist ass. Following, was an incredible fight scene of bats versus humans and monsters working together. The whole movie moving to a head, into a full blown race war, goddamn. Now, in the end of the movie, they won, kicking ass. Good triumphs over evil.

Like I said, I really, really liked this movie, including the art style and the story. Usually, whenever it comes to sequels, I’m very touch and go. However, this one really was an enjoyable ride. As I said earlier, I’m not discouraging anyone to see this movie. Racial undertones were definitely in it, but only to show a positive message that it is not okay to treat somebody differently. Whether they are human, monster, or unicorn.

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Photos are from the official Hotel Transylvania Facebook

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2 out of 5

project almanac cast

When I first started seeing trailers for Project Almanac, I was definitely curious. This time travel flick about selfish high schoolers looked pretty darn good. The trailer sucked you in with a group of friends using time travel for their own gain. Then it turns kind of creepy, when you see that time travel can, oops, screw things up.

Unfortunately, the movie definitely didn’t live up to the trailer for me. I thought maybe it was one of those instances with two many writers and/or directors, nope. One director and two writers. I’m currently exhausted and didn’t even feel like writing this review. I thought, I’ll find a review by someone with similar views and share that. I CAN’T FIND ONE! What? So, basically, others have issues with the science behind the film, but embraced what disappointed me. My views are a bit different.

Yes, there are definitely times that I thought, no, just no, that doesn’t make any science. Keep in mind, that I’m not scientifically minded. I’m pretty likely to not know if someone is using the correct piece when they are building something. I also don’t mind shutting off my mind to enjoy something fun, to an extent.

project almanac time machine

However, unlike others, I don’t believe that you need to see this JUST because it’s a time travel movie. As if, a dearth of movies means that poor ones should just exist to fill the void.

Have you seen the trailer? No?

Okay, now you have. You don’t even need to watch the movie. That is everything that you need to know and it doesn’t have to work, because it’s a trailer. You are supposed to want more.

What happens? Okay, a guy, his sister (a pretty, thin blonde who’s being bullied, *rolls eyes*), and his likeable friends build a time travel machine based on his late father’s plans. Later, a “hot”, popular girl joins their group and decides that she’s an integral part of it. IMHO, she is not.

At first, everything seems fine, the kids get money, popularity and sex. I’m not gonna lie, some of those scenes are amusing. They even get to see Imagine Dragons live. That’s super fun.



(from the same show this movie would have been filmed at)

Then the lead decides to start jumping around through time solo and disasters happen. If I were one of the kids, I would have rationalized the hell out of being at fault for huge disasters though, as one does. This is when the illogical time travel starts really bothering me. Now, it’s not just for fun. He has to fix things, but with the way that things have been going, I can’t buy what follows. Plus, even if I tried, it’s like he intentionally mucks things up.

I did enjoy his friends, but they didn’t get enough screen time. His love interest is annoying and the sister wasn’t onscreen long enough for me to form an opinion.

Yes, I’m impressed that this movie was filmed for around $3 million and earned about 10 times that much, but going into it, I didn’t know that. As a casual viewer that shouldn’t concern me. (Although, I’m sure producer Michael Bay is thrilled.) Another plus is that the film wasn’t overly long. Some found the fact that it’s set up as a found footage film to be a detractor. It slightly enhanced it for me, making the creepy scenes a bit creepier. Maybe, my biggest issue is that the lead becomes unlikable, but not annoying enough to completely hate. I like to have some strong feeling one way or another, when I’m watching someone’s story. I’m really only giving it 2 out of 5 stars for the initial premise and fun section of them just goofing around for personal gain.

SKIP IT

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3.5 out of 5

sex tape movie poster

Early this year I caught the first Sex Tape trailer. I knew from the moment I started watching that I had to see it upon release. It seems like it’s taken forever to come out. Okay, that’s probably just me.

Sex Tape is about a married couple (Cameron Diaz and Jason Segel) who make a sex tape to spice things up. In these tech heavy times though things like this tend to get out quickly.

Let’s get the looks thing out of the way. This is a movie (albeit a comedy) with nudity and simulated sex so it’s not like I’m going to ignore what they look like. The last time we saw Cameron Diaz and Jason Segel together was in the hilariously awesome Bad Teacher. At that time I was super hot for Segel. Since then he’s gone super extreme with losing weight. His drawn face combined with his receding hairline is a bummer. Good news for Diaz fans though, she’s lookin’ good. I just watched her in The Other Woman, in which she was sporting some bad collagen and I’m guessing other plastic surgery don’t s. She’s looking much more natural here. And yes you do get to see her strut around in her undies, so for everyone who enjoyed that scene in Charlie’s Angels you’re in for a treat.

sex tape movie lowe

So, plot? It wasn’t quite what I thought it’d be. The flick opens with Diaz narrating for her mommy blog. Eek. Okay, I have read some, but this didn’t take my fancy. One subplot is that she’s trying to sell her blog to some big corporation headed by Rob Lowe. I did enjoy the Lowe scenes. At first he just seems to be doing his overly nice Parks and Recreation character but later it gets weird and fun.

sex tape movie early sex

Segel is somewhere up the line of the radio DJ hierarchy, which I am not familiar enough with to completely explain to you. Seems like a decent, fun job though. Between his job, her blog and MAINLY, their two children, they never have time to get busy. We know that it hasn’t always been like this since we do get a fun flashback of all of their early boning times back in college. I kind of think Diaz almost pulls off looking college age with her young do.

The movie starts out strained. I suppose it’s since that’s how they are feeling but it’s not so fun, aside from the screwing montage. Eventually (okay, it’s not even a long movie, but I’m impatient), we get to the night that they get down to business.

sex tape movie book

After many funny, failed attempts at getting busy, Segel even says “it’s like we forgot how to have sex”, (even his kissing technique seems to need a lot of work in this scene). Diaz finally gets a great idea! Making their own porn, of course. This is super easy since Segel always has a surplus of iPads due to his hazy job. I did enjoy their preparation, tequila and a vague porn plot, doing the entire Joy of Sex.

The rest of the movie is pretty what you’d expect from the commercials. They run around trying to stop others from seeing their sex tape and end up getting into some fairly funny hi jinx. Rob Corddry and Ellie Kemper (both of whom I’m big fans of) costar as their married couple friends. Neither gets that much to do but both are amusing, as usual. I was surprised by some tech stuff in the flick but I don’t want to give it away. There’s also an awesome cameo.

I must admit that I am biased when it comes to this movie. I could picture something like this happening to me in my 40s. There’s even stuff I happen to be familiar with in the movie-3 hour sex sessions, a super long jelly dildo (I didn’t know any better) and YouPorn. So yeah, I’m kind of the target audience here.

Despite that fact it didn’t blow me away. I did enjoy it and it might be funnier on a second viewing but I’m not sure. I’d recommend seeing it during a cheap matinee or waiting for it to hit VOD and DVD.

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posted by on Christmas, Movie Reviews, Movies/TV

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Credit: Disney DVD Copyright: disneydvd.disney.go.com/PressKit

Credit: Disney DVD
Copyright: disneydvd.disney.go.com/PressKit

I do not watch many children’s films because I am not a parent. When I do, I prefer them to be like this one, without any cursing, double entendres or a bunch of pop culture references. This film succeeds on all counts. The only thing I would make sure to make clear to children is not to feed dogs candy or cookies. Most importantly it features adorable puppies and a Christmas story.

It’s your basic “We need to save Christmas story” but with a twist, told from the perspective of puppies. The protagonist is Puppy Paws, soon to be successor to his father Santa Paws. Santa Paws is Santa’s (George Wendt) right hand dog. Puppy Paws is bored with North Pole life and decides to see how normal puppies live.

These “normal puppies” are the infamous Buddies. I’ve only seen one other of these series of films (so far), the not as good but still adorable Space Buddies. However, if you’ve never seen any of them you still get a brief introduction to the characters. They are Budderball (likes to eat), Mudbud (likes to get dirty), B-Dawg (enjoys rap and dancing) and Rosebud (fashionista). Human co-stars include Christopher Lloyd as the evil dog catcher and Danny Woodburn (Seinfeld) as an Elf.

Puppy Paws tries to fit in and make friends but stirs up trouble. Of course Puppy Paws learns that the true meaning of Christmas isn’t about toys. I smiled a lot and even laughed out loud at some of the puppies antics.

Many movies tend to drag in the middle, including the aforementioned Space Buddies but this one was pretty entertaining all the way through. I could be nitpicky and mention that the film didn’t include enough reindeer screen time and that I’m not sure of Wendt as Santa. Why complain about an awesome holiday movie though? The film clocks in at 88 minutes so if it isn’t your thing, you won’t be bored for too long.

You can buy it from Amazon.com on DVD or Blu-ray, the super cute Santa Buddies Gift Set (DVD + Five Plush Buddies) or as a part of the Buddies DVD 4-Pack (Air Buddies, Snow Buddies, Space Buddies, Santa Buddies).

Notes: This originally appeared on Yahoo on November 5, 2009. This review includes Amazon affiliate links.

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5 out of 5

It’s so cheesy it’s practically fondue! I love that.

Warning: There are spoilers.

lv shots

Kevin Kline and Romany Malco providing a much needed public service.

When I first heard about the premise of Last Vegas a few years back I thought, that’s an immediate pass. I will not be watching that. Old guys in a rip off of The Hangover? No thank you.

Then the trailer came out and I saw that basically everyone is in this movie. You get Kevin Kline (yum), Michael Douglas, Robert DeNiro and Morgan Freeman. That’s an awesome cast.

Did it look silly, over the top and predictable? Yes. Did I want to see it? Yes. Now that I’ve finally gotten around to renting it, I have to say WATCH IT. It’s super fun.

It’s a simple plot, four OLD friends reunite for the first time in a LONG time in Las Vegas. Michael Douglas is a high powered lothario (I know, I feel like I’m in the wrong decade too) who has decided to finally tie the knot. Where does he propose? At a friend’s funeral, cuz he’s just that romantic.

He calls up all of his old buddies to get them to attend his quickie wedding to his 30something girlfriend and it quickly turns into a crazy bachelor party. There are, predictably, but hilariously none the less, a ton of jokes about her age BTW.

Wait, before we actually get to Vegas we are treated to a bit of each fellow’s life: Kline is referred to as the Bionic man as he wears a hearing aid, has a replacement hip and a full medicine cabinet, Morgan Freeman is being babied by his adult son because he had a minor stroke at some point and Robert De Niro is a grouchy shut in (surely they jest, De Niro angry? Nah).

lv party

On to Vegas, these guys are not quite up to speed on today’s scene. Luckily due to some magic on Freeman’s part the guys luck into getting their own personal assistant, the always fab Romany Malco. He helps guide them around the Vegas lifestyle and eventually gets very into it as well.

lv lmfao

There’s so much partying, Vegas baby! It’s off the chain. Yes, that is a cameo by LMFAO!

lv freeman dance

The standout for me is definitely Morgan Freeman. He gets the best lines, “I feel like a princess” and “these Red Bull and vodkas, I feel like I’m getting drunk and electrocuted at the same time”. Plus his character facilitates much of the plot.

lv steen red

lv steen sing

LV steen

There is also a competitive horn dog/grudge thing going on between Douglas and De Niro. Enter the always beautiful, Mary Steenburgen as a lounge singer.

LV suits

standout suits and yes, Turtle from Entourage

Without giving absolutely everything away, watch out for the shopping montage, woot and another unexpected, yet totally in sync with the storyline, cameo.

Sit back, have fun with it, don’t pick it apart and you will probably enjoy this flick.

You can rent or buy Last Vegas on Amazon here (affiliate link)

Photos are via the official Last Vegas twitter

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